Where have all the good men gone

Cat mai sta tava la cuptor ma gandeam sa va impartasesc o alta teorie pe care o declar confirmata. Dupa ani de zile de analiza atenta, aplicare a metodelor de cercetare si intocmirea de studii minutioase, pot sa afirm ca am descoperit raspunsul la intrebarea care-a macinat generatii intregi de femei: Where have all the good men gone?

Ei bine, iata, asteptarea a luat sfarsit. Eu, Ela, calatorind fidel prin adolescenta spre maturitate cu super-tramaviul 41 si observand miscarile traficului de persoane din acest mijloc de transport, am ajuns sa fiu ferm convinsa ca cei mai draguti baieti din Bucuresti stau in zona Tricodava. That's where.

Sa va explic. Gasesc baiatul frumos in tramvai, suntem langa Herastrau, in Crangasi sau langa Plaza si baiatul frumos sta frumos in tramvaiul frumos. S-a urcat de undeva , dar nu asta conteaza, ci faptul ca de fiecare data baiatul frumos, care nu este niciodata acelasi, coboara in statia Tricodava, iar fetele suspina duios / dupa baiatul frumos. :)

Descoperirea fenomenului duce la urmatoarele actiuni:

1. deschidere cont la BRD-ul din colt, cu depuneri si retrageri haotice in scopul de a-i zapacei pe bomboneii care vin sa plateasca facturilii
2. dat cu role in jurul parcului Dr Taberei, repetat impiedicare dar cu -atentie!- cadere gratioasa, eroii vor sari numaidecat in ajutor
3. mers vara la strandul X ligheane, pentru a face poze spre folosirea lor ca dovezi in elaborarea tezei de doctorat pe aceasta tema

Stiinta, ce lucru minunat.

Pentru oameni puternici

Cand oamenii isi deschid sufletul, devin vulnerabili. De obicei, cand se deschid de cateva ori si sunt raniti, oamenii prefera sa nu se mai deschida niciodata. Ai grija ce faci atunci cand o persoana se deschide in fata ta si are incredere in tine. Stiu ca puterea corupe si daca ai invatat sa ii faci pe oameni sa se deschida, foloseste asta ca sa oferi valoare vietii lor, sa ii vindeci, sa ii incurajezi. Nu abuza si nu profita, pentru ca pe termen lung te vei trezi singur si nefericit.
(un baiat destept de la arta seductiei)

I've had my heart broken, and it's not fun. But I'd rather have my heart broken than break someone else's heart.

Regulile dragostei

au aparut scrise aici si comentate aici.

Autoarea zice ca "desi aceste reguli nu au fost publicate precum regulile de circulatie sau regulile bunelor maniere, acestea exista! Depinde doar de tine si de rationamentul tau daca le respecti sau le ignori."

Tot de rationamentul tau tine si sa le intelegi corect. Inainte sa le scrii sau sa le comentezi.

- Simuleaza indiferenta.

Sa incepem cu efectul von Restorff. Studiile lui Hedwig von Restorff, ca si altele dupa el, demonstreaza ca oamenii tin minte in mod special prima si ultima impresie.

Oamenii ii plac si vor sa fie cu cei pe care ii simt entuziasmati in privinta lor. Daca te arati indiferenta, sansele sunt sa nici nu iti retina numele.

Simuleaza indiferenta
Ce sa faci:
zambeste-i, spune o gluma buna, razi la ale lui, pastreaza contactul vizual, la despartire arata-te si mai entuziasmata decat atunci cand ati facut cunostinta

- Asteapta 3 zile inainte de a-l suna.

Nu astepta 3 zile ci tine cont de 3 lucruri:

1. Daca te place, o sa sune. Barbatii sunt vanatori.

2. Cand un barbat e cu adevarat interesat de o femeie, isi inchipuie ca sunt o gramada de barbati in jurul ei gata sa ii faca tot felul de invitatii, motiv pentru care o sa se grabeasca sa o sune si sa aranjeze ceva "inainte sa o faca altul". Daca il suni, distrugi iluzia, o sa se simta in cel mai bun caz flatat, dupa care, cu siguranta o sa isi piarda interesul.

3. Desi poate sa para counterintuitive, lasandu-l pe el sa te sune in primele luni, iti da de fapt mai multa putere tie.

Asteapta 3 zile inainte de a-l suna
Ce sa faci:
nu suna niciodata prima, aceeasi regula se aplica si la SMSuri,
cand placerea vanatorii e intrecuta de aceea de a fi impreuna cu tine, poti incepe sa-l suni

- Fii mereu ocupata.

Desi sunt sigura ca a vrut sa zica "ACT BUSY" - which is wrong, women shouldn't fake it.. -, cu asta ii dau dreptate. Nu trebuie sa astepti ca el sa te sune si sa te invite undeva. Ai grija de celalate laturi ale vietii tale, fa-ti planuri de distractie cu prietenii, urmareste-ti visurile.. O femeie inteligenta are viata ei, dorintele ei, opiniile ei, "in" dar si "in afara" relatiei.

- Sa nu faci sex din prima seara.

Din nou de acord. Devotamentul si o relatie completa cu o persoana extraordinara sunt lucruri mult mai importante si mai meaningful (si mai rewarding) decat aventurile de o noapte si quick fun-ul, cu persoane noi si la intamplare.

- Sa nu fii tu prima care spune “te iubesc”.

Presupunand ca cei doi sunt implicati intr-o relatie reala si nu una in care el nu stie ca ea exista, iar ea ii trimite scrisori in care ii scrie mesaje cu litere decupate din ziar.. Nu vad niciun motiv logic pentru care ea sa nu ii spuna ca il iubeste atunci cand o simte, chiar daca o spune prima.

Ba din contra, e o dovada de dragoste si curaj. Daca nu o facem noi, care ne-am specializat in a ne cunoaste sentimentele si a vorbi despre ele.. atunci cum sa ne asteptam sa o faca ei?

Sa nu fii tu prima care spune “te iubesc”
Ce sa faci:
Spune-i lucrurile care iti plac la el. Cu siguranta nu poate sa iti citeasca gandurile, asa ca atunci cand simti un lucru si vrei ca el sa stie, spune-i. Foarte bine ar fi sa-i poti spune si de ce.

"People fall in love with people in whose eyes they behold the most ideal reflections of themselves; make your Quarry feel beautiful, strong, handsome, charming, dynamic, or however he or she wants to feel. There are big-stroke compliments, little-stroke caresses, and a myriad of deliciously devious means to make your Quarry feel special. Subtle procedures can convince Quarries what they've suspected all along: "I am different. I am wonderful. And to thank you for recognizing this amazing fact, I'll fall in love with you.''"

zice Leil Lowndes in How to make anyone fall in love with you.

- Fa-l sa simta ca are concurenta.

Ar fi naivi sa creada ca nu au concurenta. Barbatii iti fac avansuri si cand stiu ca esti deja implicata intr-o relatie. Ca pericolul e mai mic sau mai mare,.. el exista.

Daca e cazul:
spune-i ca are concurenta. Mai ales daca tu vrei o relatie completa, healthy, committed, iar el nu stie inca daca e pregatit pentru ea. Simte-te libera sa te intalnesti cu alti barbati in timp ce el isi rezolva dilemele. Si cand isi da seama ce vrea, atunci stabiliti pasul urmator in functie de ce va doriti amandoi in momentul acela.

- Fa-l sa-ti simta lipsa.

Cel mai bine o zice David DeAngelo prin

"GIVE HER THE GIFT OF MISSING YOU

If you're around all the time, you become
predictable, expected, and uninteresting.

On the other hand, if you're mysterious,
challenging, and hard to pin down, she will think
about you and miss the times she's had with you."

Dar, don't forget our old friend, The Law of Scarcity.

Si, binenteles, faptul ca dragostea e cu totul altceva.

Show your girl some PC magic

Most of the girls are really not the gadget type and, don't get me wrong, that's a good thing. Boys have their things, we girls have ours. But we do have an Intermediate pride that makes us touchy when someone says that we can't do something technologically related. And busting on our balls will create the right kind of magic, that some of the guys just won't understand.

So let me tell you how to play with her..

While she's checking her email or writing something online, tease her about how slow she is with the keyboard. If you're at her place then you can bust on how she uses such an oldie browser, or an outfoxed anti-virus, or on her connection speed..

"Is that page playing hard to get with you?", "I hope your Norton isn't your single method of protection", "Is there someone in the other room writing those google answers right at this moment?" Make sure not to sound to arrogant, don't laugh at your own jokes and give her a kiss in between the fun lines.

If she backfires tell her she's just bragging and that you bet she can't do something as simple as creating a folder. She will immediately jump to prove to you that she can so now it's time to show her some Windows tricks.

Tell her "Ok. Create me a folder, anywhere you would like BUT with the name of CON". Miss Hi Tech will not be able to do so, anywhere Miss Hi Tech will try.

Tell her to open an empty Notepad file, type "Bush hid the facts" (without the quotes), save it as whatever and wherever she wants, close it and re-open it.

You can also tell her to open Microsoft Word and type =rand (200, 99) and then press ENTER. "See what happens if you're using old stuff like Norton? I could show you something much more powerful then that.."

BTW - If she takes what you say as something sexually related, you can bust on her the major way about how you are tired to be seen by women as just a piece of meat. Start saying things like no one seems to notice your personality and how they all want you for your physical appearance. Keep on going and accusing her to stare at your a** or whatever and how she is just like the others. Make it sound like she is after you..

Don't forget to Google the tricks explanations for the impossibility of naming folders as CAN, AUX, PRN.. , the Bush hid the facts oddity and the =rand () function . Now you know what to do when you see a girl in front of a computer..

Dare

To be a unique woman

1.In 1924
Conrad Hilton, the founder of the Hilton hotel chain, flipped over a red hat that he spotted sitting five pews in front of him in church. After the services, he followed the red hat down the street and eventually married the lady walking under it.
(zice Leil Lowndes intr-un ebook)

2.At the beginning of this month, November 2007,
Patrick Moberg, 21 year-old Brooklyn webpage designer, was smitten by a beautiful girl in the subway so posted a drawing of her on a webpage in the hope that someone would recognise her. He called it nygirlofmydreams.com.


In less than 48 hours, Brooklyn boy had found his dreamgirl. He had some help. A story about his search ran in the New York Post. It became a typing point on other websites, and finally a co-worker of Camille Hayton's made the link.


"It was the flower in her hair.."


Patrick told the New York Post they were meeting for coffee this weekend. No pressure. Just 8 million people waiting on the outcome.


To be yourself around women

If you've ever asked a girl what to do to meet a girl, she'll probably say "just be yourself." You may think that means that if you feel nervous, and that you want to tell her again how pretty she is (for the 40th time) that you should...

But that's NOT what she means. She means to treat her normally...almost like one of your guy friends. If you're at the bar, and she asks you to get her a napkin...she's probably just asking to see if you'll jump through a hoop for her.

Don't do it! You wouldn't break your back to do that for one of your good friends...don't treat her differently. Just be yourself!

(Explained by someone who get's it)